Frenemies
Series 4- Installment 1
1983
Just when I thought life might finally settle into some kind of normal, Dad sat us down and told us we were moving again.
He’d been offered a job in San Francisco he couldn’t refuse, and just like that, everything shifted again. We couldn’t afford to live in the city but a small town north called Napa looked promising. It was nothing like where we lived in East LA and Dad was very proud of that, said we were moving up in the world. I didn’t understand at all what he meant, but I guess I would soon find out.
I was in the sixth grade now and the first day of school was tough, as it is for every new kid, but what struck me most was how different these kids were from the ones at my old school. There the sixth graders were still kids and had a rough-and-tumble innocence about them even though some were bullies. But here, in Napa, they looked like miniature high schoolers, especially the girls. They wore tight designer jeans, feathered their hair, and expertly applied makeup. Some even had boobs already. I felt like I had stepped into an entirely different world.
Determined to find my footing, I did my best to navigate this new reality.
Then, while hanging upside down on the monkey bars, I struck up a conversation with a fair-haired girl named Nancy.
Nancy was more like a normal kid, like me but more of a tomboy. She wore her hair short and even dressed like a boy. She was amazing on the monkey bars and could spin really fast and do other cool tricks that I’d never seen before. She taught me a thing or two about the monkey bars that day that really surprised me. She was sweet and smart, and I liked her instantly. We weren’t in the same class, unfortunately, but we found each other each day at recess and lunch.
Alongside my budding friendship with Nancy, I also caught the attention of three girls in my class. Their names were Krissy, Kristy, and Barbara. They were the popular ones, more like high schoolers than sixth graders. I never expected them to notice me, but I could feel their eyes following me whenever I walked by. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
Then, one day, when Nancy was home sick, they made their move.
I was heading to the swings when Krissy called my name. I turned, and suddenly, I found myself cornered in the narrow alleyway between two school buildings. My pulse quickened. Krissy stepped in close, close enough that I could smell her bubblegum lip gloss. Without warning, she reached out and ran her fingers through my hair, twisting one of my homemade barrettes between her fingers.
“These are cool,” she said casually. “Did you make them yourself?”
I nodded, my throat suddenly dry. Kristy and Barbara stood slightly behind her, one on each side, as if to block my escape.
Krissy smiled, but there was something unsettling about it. “You’re kinda pretty,” she said.
I swallowed hard. “Thanks.”
She glanced at the other two. “Don’t you guys think so?”
They nodded in agreement, eyes flicking over me like I was being appraised for value.
For a second, I let myself believe this was some kind of initiation, that maybe they actually wanted to be my friends. Then Krissy’s voice dropped into something lower, silkier, but with an undeniable edge.
“You wanna be popular?”
“yeah.” I said.
“Look, if you want to hang out with us, you gotta drop that nerdy girl, Nancy. You’ll never popular with that ugly thing as your friend.”
The words hit like a slap.
I opened my mouth to argue, to say something, anything but no words came out.
Krissy leaned in, lowering her voice even more. “And if you really want in, you gotta prove it. Fight her at recess and then when she’s down you have to spit on her.”
I stared at her, stunned.
“We’ll set it up when you’re ready,” she added smoothly, like this was a business deal. “Just let me know.”
My heart pounded in my ears. My stomach twisted. The only thing I could manage to say was, “Okay.”
The girls left me standing in the alley, my mind spinning. My heart pounding in my chest as I played their words over and over again.
Becoming friends with the popular girls was something I had dreamed of, but not like this. Not at the cost of betraying Nancy. At my old school, things had been so much easier. I never had to think about these kinds of things. I just hung out with who I liked. But here, the rules were different. It was survival of the fittest.
